Await Our Wrath

Await Our Wrath

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Why The Statement “I like to do sports.” Is Funny

Why the Statement “I like to do sports.” is Funny:
An Academic Analysis



Historically those who are not capable of performing athletic activities sufficient to impress their female peers, choose other diversions to pass the time. These include activities like: painting tiny dolls (sometimes called action figures), writing fan technical manuals for the USS Enterprise, or reading books. As such, the syntax and semantics of sports jargon escapes them. Lack of specificity as to the type of sports one enjoys is a key indicator of this subculture's (pejoratively referred to as “nerds”) ignorance . Additionally those who eschew physical fitness in favor of drinking Mountain Dew and hand carving multifaceted dice often feign interest in sports in an effort to avoid physical altercations or “beatings”. The statement "I like to do sports!" is a perfect example of something a person who couldn't do sports even if he liked to, would say. The telltale absence of specificity, paired with the misunderstood notion that the word “sports” is an adverb, suggests that the person making this erroneous declaration is unable to compose a pro-sports comment capable of camouflaging his love of World of Warcraft. Because everyone knows that gross generalizations and the purveyance of derogatory stereotypes is funny, the ability to use this statement “I like to do sports!” to highlight the suspect impetus of nerds (who have no business fitting in), makes the statement funny.

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